Sunday, December 03, 2006

Christmas Party Games!

Stumped on what parlor games to play on your Christmas party? Fret no more! Just follow the list below for an unforgettable party! But don’t forget the helmet, elbow and knee pads, last prayers. And waivers have to be signed before everybody gets ready to rumble!

Mud wrestling: Employees with axes to grind against their colleagues are encouraged to join this game! They can get physical, press their enemies’ faces deep on the mud, throw mud at the hollering audience, pig out on mud, let their pet pigs roll on the mud, etc. As a twist, whipped cream, chocolate, cappuccino, soda, etc., can be used as substitutes for mud, but it won’t be mud wrestling without the mud.

Russian roulette: The depressed and suicidal in your payroll will love this game! But to amp the thrill, everybody will be required to take turns in pointing a Magnum .357 revolver loaded with armor-piercing cartridges on their temples. It is also the best way to retrench the workforce, that is, if somebody survives.

Tumbang Preso: The game that you used to play as a kid where you knock down tin cans with your slippers has been modified for psychopathic vigilantes. In the new version, Punisher-wannabes get to hunt convicts like game animals. And it can also be further tailor-fit to suit one’s ideological affiliations, thus, Tumba Kapitalista and Imperialista has been created for Leftists and Tumba Aktibista and Komunista for Rightists.

Kris Kringle: In the spirit of Christmas, the CEO will trade his 13th Month Pay with the Maintenance Guy and the company’s Stale Meat (employees who have been around since Prehistoric Times) will exchange their bonus with the Fresh Meat (those who have been hired on the eve of the party). Now, that’s a fine demonstration of Yuletide charity!

Trip to the HR Office: This is a modification of the well-loved Trip to Jerusalem! Truant employees will be ordered to troop to the HR Office to get their memos for chronic tardiness, absenteeism, fights, insubordination, and other infractions. The HR Manager, attired in a red suit with horns and a pitchfork, will whip the problem employees until they renounce their wicked ways.

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